Oh, my dear, you simply cannot appreciate the true chaos of the Aether until you’ve seen it through the proper distortion.
I acquired these Spectacles not on this Earth, nor even in this Century. It was on a rather precarious stopover in a place called the Burning Expanse—a strange, temporary gathering where the most delightful degenerates from every timeline met to swap secrets and dance under a sky that seemed to be actively melting.
I needed eyes that could hold a pattern together, even as the landscape (and perhaps my own reality) began to fracture. These weren't for keeping the dust out of my eyes; these were for seeing the music and hearing the light.
They were originally worn by a rather handsome Chronomancer who was terribly adept at getting into trouble and even worse at explaining how he arrived. He claimed the kaleidoscope lenses were calibrated to help him find the seams in time—the very points where one age bled into the next. For a more high-velocity voyage, you might prefer the sleek Hyperspace Navigator’s Visage. He also claimed they looked quite dashing, which is, of course, the primary requirement for any serious Steampunk adventurer.
The brass plating is heavy, meant to withstand a skirmish or two, and the spiked perimeter is hardly for decoration; they kept any overly enthusiastic automatons—or overly familiar dance partners—at a polite distance.
Wear them, my dear, and you won’t just look at the world; you will look through it. You will see the truth the gears are trying to hide. And when you arrive late to your next engagement, you can simply blame a momentary miscalculation in the Fourth Dimension.
Product Specifications (For the less dramatic):
Materials: Durable Brass-tone with, Heavy-duty Spiked Detailing
Lenses: Removable and Interchangeable Kaleidoscopic Glass
Fit: Adjustable Elastic Band for secure Goggle placement
Aunt Matilda’s Guarantee: Certified to improve all dance-floor maneuvers.
